Jokes

Multitask

I’m sick of people saying men can’t multitask. I can tell my ex girlfriend she looks beautiful and………

…….keep a straight face at the same time.

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Jokes

Somersault

If one more person asks me to do a somersault……..

………I swear I’m gonna flip.

Jokes

Parachute

My ex-girlfriend is doing a sponsored parachute jump tomorrow. I am sincerely and genuinely scared that the chute won’t open……….

…….the last time something that big hit the earth, the fucking dinosaurs got wiped out.